Sonya Markey Counselling in St Albans
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St Albans CounsellorI believe we all have, in ourselves, the ability to work through our own problems; sometimes we just need the space, time and support to do it. Talking through emotional turmoil, life experiences or life changes can help you gain clarity and a better understanding of yourself.
Sometimes talking to our friends and family can seem too daunting, often we can’t help wondering if we will be taken seriously and what they might think of us. We don’t want to worry them or think nobody will be interested.
What would it be like to talk to someone who will listen without judging you or offering you advice? Someone who can be a thinking partner?
As a psychodynamically trained counsellor I aim to do just that
Psychodynamic counselling gives significance to the role of early experiences in shaping our psychological development and our relationships as adults. As a Psychodynamic therapist I believe we are influenced by both conscious and unconscious thoughts, desires, fears, anxieties and fantasies. Counselling provides the opportunity to explore any, or all of the issues you are concerned with in a safe secure environment.
Your initial appointment with a St Albans Counsellor will give you an opportunity to meet with me to decide whether you will feel comfortable working with me and a possible focus for our work together. We can then arrange a time to meet each week. Counselling sessions are 50 minutes.
Fees are £45 per session.
Centrally located in the heart of St Albans. The Albany Centre is dedicated to providing training and therapy services including psychodynamic counselling, clinical supervision, writing, voice/speech therapy and much more in St Albans. Our central location means we are able to provide low cost room hire for therapists, training areas and facilities for professionals as well as meeting and interview rooms suitable for small businesses in St Albans. All our rooms are comfortable, decorated to a very high standard and all come with complimentary WiFi.
The Albany Centre is 10 minutes’ walk from both St Albans City and St Albans Abbey train stations and there is ample public parking available at the nearby Maltings car park which is also situated on Victoria Street, in St Albans. St Albans is a short car journey from Hemel Hempstead and Hatfield. St Albans can be reached by in minutes by train from Harpenden and Radlett.
I also offer psychodynamic counselling in Bishop's Stortford.
Telephone me direct 0796 364 1970, please do leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as possible. Alternatively email me:
Next year I hope to be able to offer counselling sessions in Harpenden town centre.
WHO NEEDS COUNSELLING?
Probably the most common opening to a first counselling session is “I’m not sure I need counselling, but…” And I imagine a lot of you reading this might be having the same thought, and the same feelings of hesitation and wariness. So how do you know if you need counselling? It is usually not too difficult to tell when we are unhappy or dissatisfied with life. Often the reason is an obvious one. Maybe a relative or friend has died or we have lost something precious. Maybe we are behaving in ways which are making day-to-day living difficult, obsessing about dripping taps or exploding with anger at work or at school, or harming ourselves in different ways and becoming secretive or dishonest. Sometimes the reason for our unhappiness is less clear. We may feel flat or stifled even when everything is apparently going well. We may be feeling alone, despite lots of Facebook friends. We may even feel cross with those we love, parents or partners. We may feel ashamed that we can’t make everything ok for ourselves, that we should be happy. Or even that we are somehow not like everyone else, that we are bad or unacceptable. But what’s the use in talking to a complete stranger about all that?
Our friends, peers, colleagues and family often notice when we are unhappy. “You don’t seem your usual self today,” they might say, or simply “What’s up? Are you alright?” And we will often answer, “Oh, I’m OK” or, “It’s nothing, I’m just a bit tired”. The point is that it is not easy sharing how we really feel, even when we have suffered a loss and it should be understood by those around us why we are sad. There are many reasons for this. The most common one is being afraid of the consequences. Telling our loved ones that we are self harming is likely to lead to a massive row, causing blame and more upset. We may avoid telling our Line Manager that we feel depressed, for fear that we will be seen as weak or even passed over for promotion. Our friends will listen and be kind but our fear is that we are becoming less and less attractive or fun to be around – that they will tire of us because we are needy and bring down the mood. The ideal person would be somebody with whom we have no ties. Who will listen but not judge us as a fun or dull friend, good or bad child, weak or strong colleague, or a kind or unacceptable person.
Counsellors offer this. A counsellor will listen to what we are saying and also to what we are not saying, what we find difficult or impossible to put into words. A counsellor will accept us exactly as we are, whatever we think of ourselves or what we have done. A counsellor will not give us answers, or tell us how to live our lives, or offer sympathy. A counsellor will work hard to allow us to see for ourselves how other people see us, how we affect other people and how our behaviour links to our ways of understanding the world around us. A counsellor will believe in our potential to be different or to realise our dreams or to make changes when we are struggling to see how that could possibly be.
And, yes, it may feel funny or wrong that we have to pay for this service. It may even feel a bit embarrassing to ask for help. Counsellors train hard to be able to listen to, care for and understand people in this way and to this depth. It is not easy to do this well.
So, who in St Albans needs a counsellor? All of us at different times need somebody by our side who knows us, understands us and values us. Once we feel known, understood and worthwhile, then we can start living again...or, maybe, even for the first time.
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